Too many thoughts to decide on an appropriate title...

Today I feel sad, but not really for a bad reason - in fact, I suppose for a good reason. Do you ever have one of those days, when you face all the feelings that you normally keep locked up tight, that you struggle to keep on top of on a daily basis? Today is one of those days. A day when you open your heart up to someone and as you're saying the words, all the emotion attached to them, hits you like an avalanche.

Mums are awesome aren't they? I mean, they all have their bad days where they moan too much and they're in your business, but generally mum's are amazing. My mum IS amazing.

I remember about 3 years ago, when I told her about a relationship I'd had with someone who was 8-9 years younger than me. I remember watching her take it all in, her head almost exploding at all the information and then her just being incredibly normal about it. I remember that she didn't question what I felt or how I acted, but just accepted unconditionally. I remember that when I left my husband and tried to start a different life, how helpful she was and how understanding she tried to be. I remember above all else that I was amazed at just how great she was about everything.

Now, all these years later, here I am leaving my husband again - this time for good - and how amazingly supporting she's being. For the last few weeks, she's bent over backwards to lend me her car, to give me some of the freedom I've been desperately seeking and to make the situation I'm going through, just a little easier. Today once more, she showed me just how incredibly awesome she is.

I never meant to pour my heart out to her, I don't even know how the subject came up but yet I found myself, cup of tea in hand, telling her about things in my life that I never really thought she'd understand, let alone be supportive of. I told her about someone I'd been in touch with recently and feelings I had. I told her about a Tuesday a few weeks ago and the space in between. I told her that it felt like I was getting over not only a marriage, but a heart break at the same time.

Not only did she listen (and not fall off the sofa in surprise) but she actually tried to help. She offered solutions and encouragement until the point that I was left with nothing but tears.

It was at this point, I attempted a getaway, knowing that my emotions were getting to the point that I didn't want anyone else to see. Her parting words to me were "I wasn't brought up on Disney, but I still like happy endings" and it was with that I quickly dived into my car and drove away, through the blur of tears I was then crying.

I know my mum will probably never read this blog but I really just wanted to get down in words how amazing I think she is. I hope that, when my children are older, they will look at me and think exactly the same.

“Mother is the one we count on for the things that matter most of all.”
-Katherine Butler Hathaway